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Leaving school. Falling out and Making new friends.


The most beautiful discovery true friends make is that they can grow separately without growing apart.

Elizabeth Foley

Since finishing High School I have barely seen my friends or spoken to them. I suppose that means they are not proper friends, which is what I suspected, but you never want to think that do you. No one wants to think that their friends are not really friends, because no one wants to feel alone. But, in the brutal reality of life, I'm afraid real friends never seem to exist, which is a painful lesson I have had to learn.

All school year me and my friendship group have grown and blossomed. We have been hanging out more, have seen each other a lot more often thanks to the schools rigorous weekend classes instated to help us prepare for our GCSE's. All this exam drama, Prom stuff, and our everyday lives has intertwined us in a way never before seen. However, growing too close has it's consequences. You learn things about each other you never wanted to know, or perhaps you know too little.

Me and one of my friends had a recent falling out, and it hurts. Never, do you ever expect to fight with your best friends, for together you feel like some kind of invincible force no one can mess with. Yet, one thing leads to another, and someone ALWAYS ends up getting hurt.

I have ruined a lot of relationships this year. The one with the boy I liked. With my sister. And now one of my closest friends. The reason why me and my friend (lets call her Tiffany) had a fight was because she betrayed me, and let us all down. At the start of the year the group let Tiffany be in charge of sorting out Prom transport, yet several months later, and nothing has been done. Tiffany gave excuse after excuse until finally, I snapped. After confronting her about the matter, she got all defensive, claimed I was in the wrong, and left our group chat. Since then, we have been acting really weird with each other, for I have not forgiven her, and she perhaps still believes I am the villain. She left us all in trouble, as we had no time left to sort out other means of transport, so now have to rely on Taxis. Now, after a similar argument over my hair of all things, she left the group chat again, and the other girls have been sharing their opinions on the matter.

Toxic relationships are ones that need to be dealt with fast and as safely as possibly. I am not saying I hate Tiffany. After all we have been through together, all the fun times, and the talks and memories, hating her is something I could never do. You could say its disappointment. I know we can never be the same two naive friends we once were, and I know we may never be proper friends again. Like with the rest of my friends who I will probably never see again once Prom is over.

Knowing its all over is perhaps the hardest part. Over the last five years you have met some truly amazing people, made some great relationships, and built bonds thought to last forever. Thinking about how you will never sit next to that guy you like ever again in science class, or how never will you walk past the lads leaning against the maths lockers, or stand for long chats with your favourites teacher, or go to choir every Friday lunchtime with the girls. Never will this stuff happen again with this people. We don't realise how lucky we are to have something until its all gone. Only when its gone do we realise just how special small things are. We could link this back to my post about Change. We are all scared of change, but soon the changes will merge into our lives until you feel no different than before. Some friendships are made to last, but not all are.

Ones which are able to grow and develop are friendships that are truly special. Friends who can respect each other, stand by each other, and have faith in one another, those are the friends worth having. Friends who constantly bicker, fight, and fall out. Those are the friends who will move on. We should not hold onto the past, but learn from it, and move on. I know its hard, but it is the bitter truth.

I have yet to make any proper new friends. It is still the very beginning of the summer, I have yet to find a job, a I have two whole years of 6th form to meet new people. On Induction day, I got along with all the people I met, and I know I will have a lot of fun next year. I went in confident, and got rewarded by meeting great people. Don't be afraid or embarrassed to meet new people and make new friends, truth be told they may be just as scared as you are. We are all in the same boat, but together we can fight our way through the storm until we land on the safe shores that make rest of our lives.

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